Thank you for listening to The Champion Forum Podcast with Jeff Hancher! Your words hold power, but are they helping you or hurting you? Over time, many leaders pick up phrases that they use to try to soften the impact of their feedback or requests. While well-intentioned, these phrases hurt your leadership credibility and decrease employee engagement. Today, on the Champion Forum Podcast, we discuss the leadership phrases you need to stop using right away and what you can say instead.
Communication at work occurs across many mediums, from email to text, to phone calls, Zoom, and in-person meetings. In written communication, you can choose every word and review your message before sending it. In person, it is much easier to say the wrong thing or say something with the wrong tone. What you say can dramatically influence the way others perceive your message. Here are four phrases that are limiting your impact and what you can say instead.
4 Phrases to Stop Using
“Just Wanted”
When you say you “just wanted” to do something, you take the impact out of your statement. To be more assertive, try saying “I am.”
Try this instead: Say, “I am following up on our meeting.” or “I am checking in on the project.”
“I don’t want to step on anyone’s toes”
This phrase comes across as weak-minded and can make you seem unwilling to assert authority. Effective leaders will step on people’s toes, and that’s okay. We are supposed to make people a little uncomfortable because, without discomfort, there is no growth.
Try this instead: Affirm your commitment to the team and to continued growth.
“I’m just the messenger.”
People use this phrase to pass the blame on upper-level leaders. Deflecting responsibility makes it seem like you lack control over decisions and actions. Resist the temptation to throw senior leadership under the bus. You will look immature and unprofessional, and your attitude toward the change will affect your team.
Try this instead: “We have decided,” “From now on,” or “Our company is going to…”
“I don’t want to be pushy, but…”
Leaders will say this to soften the blow and make themselves seem more friendly. Instead, this language shows that you are uncertain about your judgment or what you are asking someoneto do.
Try this instead: Focus on being clear and communicating the required urgency. You might say, “This is a priority, and I need your focus on it.”
Q: What other phrases would you add to this list? Why do you think leaders use passive language? How do you think changing your language will affect how you are viewed?
Application Activity:
What other phrases do you use when feeling insecure or uncertain about what you are communicating? Make a list of these phrases and devise alternatives so you can train yourself to use stronger language. If you’re unsure, ask a trusted team member, mentor, or peer what phrases you say frequently.
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